As a girl, I’ve been through some shit, but I mean who hasn’t. As a girlfriend, that’s a different story. I’ve done, seen, and had to go through some ish. But like Drake says, “name a couple who isn’t” thank you Drake for understanding.
Unfortunately, I’ve been lied to, emotionally abused, and cheated on. These things will actually take a toll on a girl and break her in ways that make it hard AF for her to let anyone else in. Speaking from personal experiences, there are three things you should know about me first.
Number 1: Once a cheater, always a cheater.
I don’t find this phrase to be true at all. Regrettably, I was a cheater once. Let me repeat, ONCE. Never again… honestly, the reason I cheated was that it was my first “real” relationship and I was too naïve and didn’t know what love was or how it felt to be in love. I was weak and obviously not in love with my significant other. I learned my lesson quickly, so don’t worry… karma snuck up to bite me in my ass.
Takeaway: There are many fishies in the sea, when you catch the right one, you won’t want to throw it back. Buttttt, if you catch the wrong one, fish somewhere else!
Number 2: Blindsided by the best friend.
I’ve been cheated on, but I mean who didn’t see that coming after cheating on my last significant other. Oops. Well, it was the worst feeling ever! I was depressed, stressed, and frankly, looking hella cute (because I wasn’t eating lol).
You know how in movies the best friends end up together and they realize they’re in love with each other and are willing to do just about anything to be with one another? Well, that didn’t happen to me, but to my boyfriend at the time.
To think that I allowed my boyfriend to do as he pleased and gave him all my trust because he was my actual first true love (haha, OMG! That was dumb of me).
Well, he decided he wanted to be with his best friend and be with me at the same time. (Oh sweetie, you’re no Hannah Montana, you can’t have the best of both worlds.)
As I watched my life crumbling from the best seat at the movie theater, I was shocked to see how the movie ended. The male protagonist left the female protagonist for his. Best. Girl. Friend. They even ended up getting engaged and lived happily ever after…hahah jk jk that only happens in the movies, they broke off the engagement for who knows what. Lol
Takeaway: Be aware of your significant other’s “friends”. I still have trouble with this, I have trust issues to the max and I wish I didn’t. HELP! ME!
Number Three: Liar! Liar! Pants on fire!
And no, it wasn’t my redhead boyfriend from high school that did the lying.
Unfortunately, it was a guy that came into my life for a second time. The first time he came into my life, I didn’t pay much attention because well…. He was my best friend’s boyfriend. The second time he came into my life, I was in awe because he came into my life at a perfect time. He saved me from my struggles and for the first time I felt relieved, that I had forgotten all about that time he dated my best friend. “I ain’t sorry” – Beyoncé
We fell in love quickly that we blinked and all that love I had for him blinded me from the reality that we weren’t meant for each other. I had so much love that I put up with so much shit for too long.
He made me believe that we were forever. I remember asking him specifically when we were about to sign our one-year lease for our apartment, “are you sure you’re ready to be with me for another year?” His response: “I’m ready to be with you forever”. At the time it brought so much joy to my ears and I fell in love with him all over again.
Time went by and turns out: Our relationship, our love, was all a lie. We were in love with the idea of us.
Takeaway: Don’t believe those couples on social media because you never truly know what is happening behind closed doors.
Now to get cooking!
I read a lot of related articles that have to deal with pointing out what the man has to do or how they should be or what he could do better, blah blah blah…this makes the female entitled to their relationship and that’s not fair.
Well, I believe it takes two to build a relationship.
They both should feel loved, respected, and wanted.
And feel as if you’re each others’ forever.
So this is for all the not-so-perfect girlfriends that can just be a little more perfect for their not-so-perfect boyfriend. And for all those amazing men that put up with our crap and still manage to love us unconditionally.
She’s your forever if she puts in the effort.
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